No News is Good News
Reporting on this blog some time ago I spoke of the need to stop looking at the news. Finally this is something I have followed through with and the results are very interesting. As the saying goes, old habits are hard to break, and how true this is. And it is raising our awareness to our daily actions that is key to dropping those habits that – if they were ever useful in the first place – no longer serve a purpose.
The news is full of extremes and if we were to believe that these extremes are somehow normal, and the general behaviour of human kind, then we begin to see the world as a pretty rotten place. This was happening to me and has for many years, I completely lost my faith in human kind, as all the horrors of the news became some dreadful generalisation in my mind.
My habit was to wake up at around 6am, eat breakfast, drink coffee and read the news. I would then begin to feel very tired and would then doze for about another hour or so before finally getting up
For some strange reason I didn’t put it together that it was reading the news that was having the tiring effect on me. Reading about the extremes of human nature is so exhausting to me, that I would need to doze off and block it all out again, in an attempt to wake up afresh. Only afresh wasn’t happening, there would remain a sort of gloomy fog, hanging over me for most of the morning.
Now I wake at 6am, eat breakfast, drink coffee and then go out for a walk along the beautiful river Dart. In the morning I now have time to do things like gentle weight training and writing a blog.
IN other news: The self-centred have no concern for your emotional needs, at all.
Imagine a demanding child. Quite easy to do really isn’t it. Now imagine this child holding concern for an adults emotional needs. The child will know if a parent or carer is sad or in distress, and will seek to ease this in any way they know how. They will do this simply because an unhappy parent or carer is a threat to their survival. And it certainly can’t be possible for a child to provide emotional sustenance to an adult, only another adult, can do that.
So if an adult is emotionally limited (unable to recognise, appreciate, understand and express all their emotions) they will be unable to show appropriate consideration for the emotional needs of another. They’re potentially emotionally stuck in childhood and therefore very self-centred. If we’re in this kind of relationship, where one of us is equipped to consider the needs of others, and the other not, then of course this kind of discord eventually eats away at the health of the partnership.
It can be that we’ve been taught to always consider the needs of others and sometimes this is to the extreme of putting others emotional needs before our own
An imbalance of this kind in a close relationship between two adults spells disaster. It is important to look deeply at how limited we may be in expressing and understanding our emotions. If we want to move out of childhood into healthy adult relationships, where the needs of others are also important, we must become aware. Relationships where our needs are placed as equally important can be beautiful and rewarding. Being mindful of others involves an awareness of the differences between self-centred, selfish, and self-aware.
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