The Loving Nature of Mindfulness

By becoming better aware (mindful), of what’s behind our self-destructive nature, we can turn our lives around

Let’s jump straight in. For us to live a long and fulfilling life, we need to start with something very important. The ability to love one’s self. That’s right. And once again it’s possible to instantly think that this is an oversimplification.

And yet, when we look, it is easy to see, that those of us who have the grounding of self-love, are, more often than not, the healthiest, most balanced and fulfilled people around.

In contrast, as with many others, I personally grew up with love being extremely conditional. There were strings attached to any sense of self-love. In other words, I was taught to love only a few aspects of myself.

These things, within myself, that I learnt to believe as lovable, were only serving a purpose for the people I was around during childhood.

“Oh doesn’t he have an old head on his shoulders” As with this example – to learn to love one’s self for not being a child – when in childhood – can lead to all sorts of problems

Being robbed of childhood in this way can be very damaging. To much responsibility in childhood has led me to fervently avoid responsibility in adulthood. Even to myself.

And we could ask, why did this child have ‘an old head on his shoulders?’ Neglect is what comes to mind. Instead, how would it be if we were taught to love ourselves as a whole?

How would it be if we were taught, that simply acknowledging our humanity, can be sufficient to love one’s self? Why do we feel the need to make love specific to certain things? Surely our whole being is love.

Meditation that leads to improved mindfulness is an act of self- love. If we lack this, then caring for ourselves, in any fashion, will be a challenge

In this respect, if we’re struggling with our practice of meditation, and giving out all manner of reasons for why (I don’t have time, I lack self discipline etc.) it would be very valuable to question if it’s a lack of self-love that’s lying at the core.

If so, learning to love one’s self, can be a challenge the mind would prefer not to take on. Bear this in mind with the answers that present themselves when asking probing questions.