Practising Mindfulness

Category: Health and Well-being

  • Skimming Stones

    In an attempt to skim a stone the young child threw it into the air only for it to splash into the water and immediately sink

    The adult teaching the child managed to successfully skim the stone across the surface of the water.

    Later I began to think of how the stone represents information. How this information skims across the mind of an adult yet is easily absorbed by the child.

    It’s my experience that the older we get the less inclined we are to digesting new information. Especially when this information questions established models and belief systems

    To continue with the metaphor. To skim a stone we need to put in a great deal of effort. Getting it to skim across the surface tension of the water takes effort. Without realising the effort and technique required the child just threw the stone into the air. Moving slowly and directly downward the stone easily broke through the surface of the water.

    I recently read about a madman who had thousands of books he never read. He never read them because he was so certain in his already established beliefs. As a result, millions of people died. You might guess who I’m talking about.

    When we yield and finally decide to stop working so hard to remain fixed in our ideas and beliefs (that may have stopped working years ago) change can happen

    It takes more effort to remain stuck and unhappy than we realise. When new information isn’t properly, mindfully considered, it’s like the stone travelling quickly over the surface of the water. It skims across the surface of the mind as if it were never there. We remain unchanged and unhappy.

    Although new information can initially feel like someone’s throwing small stones at us that sting, once absorbed, we will eventually gain a different way of seeing things. Learning to meditate can help with this process.

  • Know Meditation Know Mindfulness

    This week, I slipped. That’s right, I slipped into an old pattern of feeling negative, stressed, and eating junk. And the only reason for it was forgetting the importance of Meditation

    Monday and Tuesday felt like great days. I felt calm and contented. I ate exactly the amount of food that was right for my body and activity. The energy in energy out balance was in tune. I felt great. The rest of the week gradually went to shit and the reason? I forgot to Meditate on each of the subsequent mornings.

    My usual routine is to do some stretches (yes, I’ve succumbed and learnt some yoga), and then I sit for around twenty minutes to meditate and calm my mind. When I do this, the day is always improved, my mood is better, and of course, it’s conducted Mindfully.

    When my day is conducted mindfully – that is to say I’m predominantly in the present moment and aware – it always runs smoother. The quality of my work is on form, and the customers I meet feel better for the experience

    I’ve come to realise that as I reflect on the week, it was the days I didn’t meditate that were markedly different. I felt harassed by my boss and my customers’ demands. Their demands hadn’t changed it was my mood and attitude that had. In an attempt to change my mood, I craved and ate sugar. And after eating pastry and chocolate, I actually ended up feeling worse! Guilt stepped in!

    Each day, my stress and problems grew worse. It was as if my forgetfulness (opposite of Mindfulness) was some kind of sick experiment on myself to see how shit I could make my week. To make matters worse, I didn’t go for my daily walk. What the hell!?

    The positive from this is how I’m reminded of the importance of sticking to my routine. For me, routine is very important

    Every negative has its opposite. I’m now renewed in my endeavour to be an enthusiastic exponent of Meditation that leads to Improved Mindfulness. I’m reminded of how important it is to Meditate every day. If we want to strengthen our minds and improve the quality of our lives, we must practise. We must practise Mindfulness to stay on the path. It is easy to forget its power.

    Remember, the mind is predisposed to lead you along the path of least resistance. Old established patterns that conserve energy are easily fallen into.

    The mind easily falls into old patterns of thinking and behaviour. And like cart wheels that are stuck in a rut, we must, from time to time, use that little extra effort to pull the mind free.

    We have to focus and concentrate. This strengthens the mind. And just as a weightlifter might occasionally feel tired and disinclined to work out, he must persist. The results speak for themselves.

  • Mindful Protection

    Gently bring the mind back into the present moment through focusing on the breath

    On the occasions, when we choose to open our minds to what the media is showing us, it seems like the world has gone mad. Has it ever been any different? Large scale conflicts are only symbolic of the turmoil and conflict our leaders are facing. Warped ideology (from our perspective) anger, fear, the need for control, the ego, et cetera, et cetera. All symptomatic of minds out of control.

    Take control of your mind. Take control of your life

    Self consciousness, self awareness, call it what you will. The greater our awareness of thoughts, and how they dictate the kind of life we live, the better. There are those who thrive on chaos. In fact they long for it because it’s all they know. I can relate to this. For much of my time I rejected all that was good in my life through my minds need to feed its addiction to chaos. Constant stimulation. Constant craving. The constant need to ease my loneliness. A loneliness fed by my need for chaos. Can you see the destructive cycle I was in? This is what so many of us are doing: Seeking to ease our loneliness. In the process, our minds take us unceasingly toward what we refuse to look at: Our fear and loneliness. It is us that’s creating the destructive cycle. It is our minds attempt to understand. Great leaders and philosophers of the past knew this and looked to help humanity in its struggles. Until we break the cycle, how will we ever understand? We cannot read and implement what the great leaders of the past taught us without first becoming aware.

    The solution, countless enlightened individuals have found is, mindfulness

    With practice we can get to the root of what we are. We can find a calmness of mind, underneath the chaos, that reveals pure awareness. When we have this, we’re able to notice all the beauty that surrounds us.

    Personal circumstances matter not. There is suffering, yet our suffering can be eased, when we have clear insight into how it is us that amplifies our self-destructive tendency.

    We could choose anger

    Mindfulness helps us understand, it’s what we choose, that determines the quality of life we experience. No matter your circumstances, through learning how to take control of your mind, you empower yourself to make the right choices. If you want purpose in your life make it the development of mindfulness. Develop a beautiful mind. People with purpose make their own choices. Not those dictated to them by others.

  • Sowing the Seeds

    If you have a plan place Understanding Meditation and Mindfulness at its Heart

    Love is Every Step – Thich Nhat Hanh

    It’s certainly how I intend spending my retirement. Someone recently asked me if I was concerned about the future. Being concerned about the future would be to use the wrong terminology. I would suggest, rather than use the word concern, use the word intension. It has positivity.

    I’m using a degree of tension to stay on track. Think of the tension we must apply to a bowstring before firing the arrow. We must have intension as much as we must have purpose. Those with purpose to life tend to have far fewer addictions (stronger willpower) and healthier minds in general.

    In order, to gently and successfully progress with our planned purpose, awareness is key. Mindful of every step.

    Keep an eye on the future

  • The Energy of Habits and How to Gain Control

    Our habits are a response. We do have both good and bad habits. And so we want rid of the bad, what must we do?

    Becoming aware is the first step. With meditation, that leads to improved everyday mindfulness, we’re better able to pause before acting on impulse. We might feel hungry and our habit is to quell this hunger with snaking. Instead, mindfulness shows us how to embrace the feeling of hunger, and instead of seeking to instantly dismiss the feeling, we experience it. We see the positive of hunger (we’re gaining a healthy weight). Not only are we better able to manage our weight with mindfulness we’re better able to decide what types of food we put in our system.

    Our habit is to respond to anxiety with consumption. When we choose to feel and work through the anxiety, we’re choosing wholeness. We’re choosing to become more human, and in turn we’re learning to be okay, with every aspect of this. Fear dissipates when we acknowledge it and understand what exactly we’re fearful of. Often our anxiety is triggered by unconscious processes learnt in childhood. We cannot discover these things – and then grow – if we continue with our negative habits.

    Perhaps the habit we have is to have a drink the moment we want to relax. Rather than instantly reaching for that bottle of wine, or whatever, how would it be if we were able to simply stop and breath

    We learn to associate. We condition ourselves to associate feelings with activities. This is especially the case with alcohol. Happy times, we drink to enhance this. Sad times, we drink to ease this. Being without the anchor of booze we’re cut adrift in a world of sharp feelings. Over time we relearn how to gently deal with our human emotions. Our habit can become of mindful considered actions. Actions that consider the wellbeing of ourselves and others.

    Negative habits tend to be the minds way of conserving energy. Very little energy is used in following an established pattern. Generating positive habits initially involves increasing the metal energy we use. Effort will be required. And just as the mind conserves energy following poor habits, in time, it will act on new patterns that have been emplaced by design. The mind will do this for the very same reason it previously followed poor habits.

    Want to stay of the vodka and crisps? Want to feel better and live a longer healthier life? Join the mindfulness revolution.

  • The Power to Choose over the Pervasive Influence of Anxiety

    We can of course get drugs to fix most things (or so we’re led to believe) and are the drugs a long term healthy fix? We may also be led to believe we’re powerless to make the changes we need. We may believe we’re unable to take control

    Intentional or not it is in the drug industries interest that we continue to believe we need their assistance. There is no doubt modern medicines have their place and value. It would certainly never be for me to advise anyone about medication prescribed by professionals. We must remember that those professionals are as reliant on drugs as those they prescribe them to. So rather than this reliance, we can seek to find the answers from within ourselves, and if those answers are beyond any recourses we hold, we must educate ourselves into changing our thinking. How does that sound? Challenging? To love a challenge we must firstly keep an eye on the prize.

    Some, after many years of searching, finally see the true reasons for their difficulties. Those that find the answers can then help us take a shortcut; a rabbit run to our prize. To take advantage of this we must listen and pay attention. We must be mindful

    Always stop and take a moment to consider the root causes. What are our responses to anxiety and fear? So many children are pacified with sweets and food. Children struggle to deal with strong emotions. Parents often struggle to deal with their children’s emotions. Instead of remaining calm and reasoned a parent may instantly seek to ease their child’s unease with sweets and food. In whatever way we seek to ease our children’s upset, we can trace our own experiences back, and see how similar solutions were offered to us. These solutions have grown and mutated over time. We may be copying the behaviour we witnessed as a child. Sometimes we’re not even consciously aware of how we reach for the distraction before experiencing the emotion.

    Instead, we must make offerings of love, and comfort. We then wait for the mind to gain control in its own time. The avoidance of feelings, through the usual unhealthy distractions, only delays the inevitable. They will always surface in some form. If we continue to eat, instead of feeling and working through anxiety, we end up with all the associated diseases that come with obesity

    The root of our anxiety can be simple. A lonely child is standing in the que at the tuck shop because he is afraid. The sweets will act as a distraction and the sugar itself will lift his mood. When we spend time with the child within ourselves, this simple act, can ease our loneliness. As adults when we’re mindful of our habits – through seeing their root – they become less like habits. When we’re aware of the distraction the feelings will surface. We must feel them to be free of them. Will drugs help us with this? Or will our awareness?

  • Feelings and Mindfulness

    If our intention is to gain better control over our behaviour mindfulness is the answer

    Often we react instinctively to our feelings. The feelings or sensations could be anger, pain, hunger or sadness. Lets start with the feeling of hunger. Hunger isn’t generally considered to be a desirable sensation. We want rid of it as quickly as possible. Especially if we’re used to the modern scourge of instant gratification. Needing to be rid of hunger instantly causes us to snack, and snacking is unhealthy. If we want to retain a healthy weight, snacking and the need for instant gratification, is to be avoided.

    Instead of the avoidance of uncomfortable feelings we must welcome them in. When we mindfully acknowledge them they naturally fade. We then have the advantage of not having acted on them

    The same applies to anger, emotional pain, and sadness. Avoidance will always involve some kind of mechanism that results in prolonging our suffering. At the end of a relationship, or any kind of loss, we might experience a whole range of feelings. Pain and sadness are avoided through seeking to replace what we’ve lost instantly. Instead, when we mindfully move through the process of experiencing our emotions, healing occurs. In time our suffering lessons. Avoidance simply defers our suffering. It can manifest in another form

    On to anger. The feeling of anger has power. How we use this power depends very much on our awareness of it’s root. Much of anger is driven by fear and there are times when we must act quickly to defend ourselves when we’re fearful. Even so, the ability to mindfully consider the ramifications of expressing our anger, is easily equal in it’s power. In fact, it could be said, that those who’re able to control their anger, are the ones who have the greatest power. The control of anger involves it’s controlled release. This can take the form of vigorous exercise. Now mindfulness really does have the power to make us well.

  • Mindfully Emotionally Whole

    Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

    Being made aware of what wholeness is and its importance for health and happiness is the first step

    Wholeness, as the word would suggest, is the capacity to embrace all aspects of the self. To become emotionally whole, we must be able to experience and accept the whole spectrum of human emotions in a way that encourages their free movement. Put another way, we must free ourselves from the habit of judging our emotions as being either good or bad. In addition, we must acknowledge the possibility that we have suppressed certain emotions (parts of ourselves) due to past trauma.

    There can be many ways in which we keep our emotional selves buried. It’s very straightforward. We may need to bury ourselves in books of a certain genre, take drugs, only ever listen to uplifting pop music, or obsessively pursue anything that takes the mind out of the present moment

    AI Generated Image

    The exact mechanism used to distract ourselves isn’t that important. What is important is acknowledging that we can be better at accepting all of our emotions as being equally important. Take a moment and consider what your reaction is to the concept of emotional blockages leading to illness in the body.

    For me, this idea has great value. And it really matters, not a jot, whether it remains a concept or becomes accepted fact. If we believe that emotions can become trapped in the body, and release and acceptance of these emotions helps us to feel better in the long term, this is what truly matters. I believe meditation, which leads to improved everyday mindfulness of how we avoid emotional wholeness, is key to our mental and physical well-being.

  • If you’re able to remain focused for forty minutes . . .

  • Mindful of the Game

    By taking a moment to process the kind of responses people give, can help to ensure the rules or purpose of the game, (it’s always a game) are fully understood

    Often, when talking to friends, family and partners, we can neglect to register the nature and true purpose of the interaction. Most importantly, there are times when the interaction has a nefarious root. Responses can be geared so that their effect, if not quickly realised, are unconsciously damaging. Subtle gaslighting if you will. Always slow and consider any potential hidden agenda when interacting with other game players.

    It may not be possible to read the true purpose of the interaction first time. No matter. Just acknowledge how the conversation or questions make you feel. In this way the next time you’ll be ready to play the game differently

    Consider something as simple as giving your opinion on how something looks. It may be that the true intention (unconscious intention) is to ultimately dismiss your opinions as worthless. Are you being lead to feel that your opinion will help to ease someone’s indicisiveness only for this to then be ignored? Does this happen often? Be aware of the game and learn how gaslighting in this way can be played to give others a harmful advantage. Harmful, because ultimately, it’s psychologically damaging. Once you’re aware (mindful), of their fear based advantage, it becomes neutralised. Your love based gameplay can come into force when you gently point out your awareness of their intention. They will of course deny any nefarious intention and this, once again, is just gameplay. Be aware.