Practising Mindfulness

Category: Human Condition

  • Mindful Protection

    Gently bring the mind back into the present moment through focusing on the breath

    On the occasions, when we choose to open our minds to what the media is showing us, it seems like the world has gone mad. Has it ever been any different? Large scale conflicts are only symbolic of the turmoil and conflict our leaders are facing. Warped ideology (from our perspective) anger, fear, the need for control, the ego, et cetera, et cetera. All symptomatic of minds out of control.

    Take control of your mind. Take control of your life

    Self consciousness, self awareness, call it what you will. The greater our awareness of thoughts, and how they dictate the kind of life we live, the better. There are those who thrive on chaos. In fact they long for it because it’s all they know. I can relate to this. For much of my time I rejected all that was good in my life through my minds need to feed its addiction to chaos. Constant stimulation. Constant craving. The constant need to ease my loneliness. A loneliness fed by my need for chaos. Can you see the destructive cycle I was in? This is what so many of us are doing: Seeking to ease our loneliness. In the process, our minds take us unceasingly toward what we refuse to look at: Our fear and loneliness. It is us that’s creating the destructive cycle. It is our minds attempt to understand. Great leaders and philosophers of the past knew this and looked to help humanity in its struggles. Until we break the cycle, how will we ever understand? We cannot read and implement what the great leaders of the past taught us without first becoming aware.

    The solution, countless enlightened individuals have found is, mindfulness

    With practice we can get to the root of what we are. We can find a calmness of mind, underneath the chaos, that reveals pure awareness. When we have this, we’re able to notice all the beauty that surrounds us.

    Personal circumstances matter not. There is suffering, yet our suffering can be eased, when we have clear insight into how it is us that amplifies our self-destructive tendency.

    We could choose anger

    Mindfulness helps us understand, it’s what we choose, that determines the quality of life we experience. No matter your circumstances, through learning how to take control of your mind, you empower yourself to make the right choices. If you want purpose in your life make it the development of mindfulness. Develop a beautiful mind. People with purpose make their own choices. Not those dictated to them by others.

  • Mindful of Future Health

    It may seem like a contradiction to say we must be mindful of the future

    We are told that mindfulness involves being present moment focused. This is true. We can be mindful of the moment and everything that’s happening right now. In this way our focus of attention helps us to extract all there is from what we’re experiencing right now. Without judgement it doesn’t matter what we are in fact doing. We might be doing something as mundane as washing up and yet as long as there is no judgement, and the mind is focused now, all is well. If whilst washing up, we’re thinking and feeling we’d rather be somewhere else, then we will rush and become frustrated at what will soon feel like a chore.

    When we add the importance of mindfulness to our physical well being, and not just our mental fitness, we gain on many levels

    I’m going to talk here about food. Oh yes a favourite subject for many. And rightfully so. Gaining pleasure from food is to be encouraged. Certainly something that I can relate to here, is the importance of recognising when the pleasure of eating has drifted out of mindfulness, and into forgetfulness. There are times when we become forgetful. Forgetful of what we understand. Most of us understand that the pleasure from eating can become something used as a coping mechanism. We feel sad or depressed and eating can change this. In particular sugar. The effects of sugar can lift our feelings. Or alternatively, perhaps we regularly become lost in the present moment of pleasure and forget our future health.

    That’s right, lost in the present moment of pleasure we can forget how we’re eating and it’s possible effects on the future. Not only must we be mindful of the present, pleasurable experience of eating, we mustn’t get lost in this. Also remaining aware of the control valve we call self-discipline will pay dividends for the future.

    We can eat too much. What stops, those who have a healthy relationship with food, overeating? I would suggest it’s exactly what I’ve just laid out. A mindfulness of how a present moment activity can effect the future. We’re mindful of cause and effect. The control valve of self-discipline is governed by an awareness of the dangers of overeating.

    I’m aware that if I carry on with my addiction to sugar it will shorten my life

    I’m pretty keen on the idea of living a long life. And not just that. I’m keen on living a long and healthy life. As odd as the saying sounds: I’d like to die well. From this moment on, I must continue to be aware of the pleasure of eating, and at the same time, be aware of healthy limits. 30 grams of sugar a day to be exact. Lets all be mindful of our limits. And whilst enjoying the pleasure of the present moment, also remain mindful of how to live a long, and healthy life.

  • Curing the Pandemic

    What do we do when there’s a pandemic?

    Well, firstly, we all get terrified, and then we calm ourselves and focus on finding a vaccine.

    And so what do we do about the current pandemic?

    I wonder if you know which particular pandemic I’m referring to? If you’re mindful of your thoughts and behaviour you’ll be aware of your own fearful responses to situations. We might verbally (or worse) lash out at a partner or friend. We might seek to control people and situations. We might freeze and simply do nothing; limiting ourselves through fear.

    As is the case with many things, the simplest solution, is the most powerful

    It isn’t necessary to negotiate with our fear, this only keeps it alive. Instead, we must focus on understanding it’s nature; what exactly are we afraid of? Becoming aware of this through meditation and mindfulness instantly reduces it’s hold over us. Previously, we weren’t aware of the fear, and now that we are, we’re able to look beyond it. What is the worst that can happen? Switch on the light of awareness through mindfulness.

    The long term cure is available when we begin to water the seeds of love and compassion

    The antidote to fear is love. Let’s say, for example, the fear is that of rejection. Look at the root of rejection and we can see, once again, it’s illusory nature. Rejection has the potential to hurt us emotionally. The fear is of that pain. It is fear of fear itself.

    When we love ourselves sufficiently, rejection, holds no potential for pain. The love of the self is the antidote. Begin by watering the seeds of love and they will flourish. Finding these seeds within involves stopping and meditating. We follow this with constant concentration and mindfulness on our thoughts and behaviour. Which seeds are you watering today?

    Learn to meditate.

  • Something from Nothing

    How can something come from nothing? What happened before time? What was there before the birth of the universe? Can something really come from nothing?

    I sense my addiction to stimulation on a constant basis. Indeed there was a time when my need for stimulation was at the extreme end of the scale. I needed chaos. I needed mania. There had to be something going on constantly. And if not I would find a way to create the chaos I craved. Drama. Oh yes please.

    Imagine coming to the understanding that the thing you prided yourself on (thinking) has actually been the cause of your troubles.

    I used to spend a lot of time in my head. Loneliness will cause this. Thinking, judging, ruminating, puzzling, questioning on and on and on. Constant chatter and deliberation. Chaos in my head and chaos in my life. So here is the solution . . . nothing.

    In my current role I spend a lot of time doing nothing. There are periods of time when I don’t see a customer for days. This can be excruciating for someone who needs stimulation.

    There is a need to keep the mind occupied if you’re addicted to stimulation. This can take the form of thinking or perhaps reading or watching something. Anything to take the mind out of the present moment. Because in the present moment there is nothing happening. And for me, purely because of my addiction, this nothing can be very tricky to deal with. There is even the possibility I’ll look to fill this nothing with eating! Again my addiction to sugar kicks in. Can you gain a sense of my dilemma?

    A dilemma until I find myself able to cope with nothingness in the present moment. And then something does come from nothing . . . calm control over my mind and my beautiful life.

    Learn to improve mindfulness from the gentle art of meditation

  • Self-awareness & Objectivity with Mindfulness

    I noticed in the news today that the mother of a child that was murdered by fellow students wants mindfulness introduced into schools. The story doesn’t make it clear what she believes there is to gain from this and I can only imagine it’s the following:

    Mindfulness increases self-awareness through our ability to see ourselves objectively

    Although this is the case, for children who have murder on their minds, for objectivity to be a preventative measure, these children would firstly need some comparisons and of course a developed sense of wrong and right. They would need a developed understanding of cause and effect. They would also initially need to care about whether their actions are wrong or right. Does self-awareness and objectivity award this to a child?

    My personal feeling is that it would need to be the parents, carers or those responsible for murderous children, to be the ones who’re more mindful

    Mindful parents are those who’re aware of what children’s minds are exposed to and the effects of this exposure. Mindful children who’ve been exposed to – and consequently instilled with – prejudices, hatred and the belief violence is a solution, will still commit murder. In fact, it might even make them better at it. Mindfulness training for children, on its own, would be insufficient.

  • Easing the Conflict

    I recently heard that there’s something like sixty five conflicts (impossible to confirm, could be more could be less, but you get the point) currently ongoing in the world. That’s right, sixty five! We can easily be indifferent to this through saying: “oh well, that’s just human nature and there’s sod all I can do about it.” And to a degree I would advise doing just that . . . be indifference toward things you can’t possibly have any influence over. However, there is something we can learn for ourselves, through simply being aware of the conflicted nature of our fellow man.

    When we have unrecognized conflict within ourselves this will always need to be expressed in some way. We humans often enjoy witnessing conflict. Be this in wars, soap operas, and politics.

    On a personal level, I remember my mother saying, on several occasions, how arguments “cleared the air.” My mother was a very conflicted person who seemed generally unhappy with the cards she’d been dealt. I feel she often needed an outlet for her frustrations. I wonder now if she imagined herself with a different life to the one she had created? Was this her conflict? It’s certain that constant arguments, with whoever was at hand, had the effect of temporarily easing the anger she felt as a consequence of her conflicted mind.

    Perhaps what she lacked was control over her situation. It is important to bear in mind, we can only effect positive influence over our external environment, once we have full control over the self. Mindful awareness is key.

    The antidote, to easing our troubled minds, is awareness. The need to experience the friction of conflict externally is there because we lack awareness. Acknowledge this.

    When we ask: What do I want? and find the answer to this question to be in opposition to what we’re actually getting, there is obviously discord. We must then find a way to become accepting of our current situation and then plan a peaceful means (draw up a peaceful plan) of getting what we want. It may take time for our plan to come to fruition and acknowledging that time is all we have helps us to become patient. After all it is not the destination that counts.

    Intention, that creates the energy needed for change to happen, is very different to the negative forces created by conflict.

    When we fail to see how conflicted we are, all we’re left with, is a sense of powerlessness. Expressing this through external means (war, arguments, soap operas, politics etc) creates the illusion of power and ultimately keeps us stuck. What’s needed is power over the self and this is gained through awareness. The awareness of our internal conflict. Do those who wage war have power over the self? Are they aware of their internal disputes? They are not.

    There is no conflict, only a short distance between where we are now, and where we want to be in the future.

  • Replace all the Parts

    When components are interconnected it means all of the parts will experience wear. If we replace a shock absorber on a car’s suspension system, we must replace all the interconnected components that are also likely to be worn. If not, we won’t experience the full benefit of the replaced part, and quite possibly, cause damage to this new part as a result.

    In this respect, if we want mindfulness to be effective, and receive great benefits from our practise, we must have an understanding of the interconnectedness and relationships between our thoughts and behaviours. Provided our understanding is deep enough, the practice of mindfulness, can improve our lives and help us understand why we do what we do. When we have this understanding we have the power to change.

    If we wish, we can trace the origins of mindfulness, back to Buddhism. And if we’re embarking on a spiritual path, as a means of developing ourselves, or simply because we have an interest in this area, then I will agree with the Buddhist’s point of view – that we cannot have mindfulness, without Buddhist beliefs.

    I am not on a spiritual path but I do want a healthy mind and body. In this respect, developing and improving my awareness of actions, words. thoughts, their root, and how they effect me, is the way forward. This, is to have a deep understanding, of mindfulness.

    I must remember that the mind is predisposed to reject what contrary to the established beliefs I hold. And to question the effectiveness of complicated solutions will help with this. Simple is challenging, and yet simple solutions, are always the most powerful. It’s conflicting beliefs that complicate matters. The belief that mindfulness must be associated with being spiritual can hold us back. We can take this one aspect of a belief system (mindfulness), believe in it’s effectiveness, and improve our general wellbeing.

    I feel that it’s much to the chagrin of spiritual leaders that we can take one aspect of a belief system, without having to abide to ridged doctrines, for it to be effective. However, to succeed at our endeavour of improved wellbeing, we must grasp all aspects of what it means to be mindful.

    The challenge is mindfulness in itself. Our addiction to being over stimulated, through thinking, lifestyle, beliefs and our behaviours is, so powerful, that the mind would much rather stick with this chaos, than find the opposing state of mind stillness will bring. The mind is often completely unaccustomed to stillness, especially during stressful, anxious times. And we can still the mind, through a deep understanding of mindfulness, even when what’s going on around us is the usual chaos. All we need do is believe it’s possible.

  • House Clearance

    My partner’s father recently passed away and now there’s a large house and double garage to clear. For over fifteen years, nothing has been thrown away, everything has just been put somewhere out of sight. As they say: “Out of sight out of mind”. I wonder if that’s really true?

    I’d rather you didn’t think I was judging the old man. Many of us have houses full of stuff we no longer use or need. As far as my partner’s dad is concerned, he had health issues. His wife died in 2007 and his son also died just last year. And so things had sort of built up, I suppose. There is even a Nissan Patrol 4.2TD in the garage, that hasn’t seen active service, for many years. I got it running the weekend just gone, but can see I’ll need to replace the brake lines before we can move it anywhere. Fix the breaks, pump up the tyres, and sneak it down south for an MOT.

    It can be hard work clearing out houses. Especially ones where so much stuff has been hidden away. Old bikes in the garage roof space. Piles and piles of old books. The old man actually built the house, with the help of the rest of the family, so there’s even leftover building materials to get rid of. So much stuff to dispose of

    We have made a start. I started to feel a little depressed when spending so much time down at the recycling centre. I wondered: How much of this stuff is actually recyclable? Not a lot. Best to just chuck it. It’ll get burned or crushed and buried. Quite cathartic to be disposing of all the garbage.

    With mindful breathing we say: “Come home to your body” When you become mindful of your breathing you become aware of your only true home

    In this way we can also become aware of the clutter that’s constantly been recycled through our minds. Far best to acknowledge this ‘clutter’ than bury it where it can’t be seen. When we acknowledge it, we can deal with it. Deal with it. It seems to me, that living in a house full of unwanted and unnecessary clutter, can be very depressing. Get rid of it now, never leave it there believing . . . Out of sight out of mind. This isn’t true.

  • All the things to Cultivate

    There are certain conditions that will make it hard to cultivate the following:
    • Love
    • Compassion
    • Generosity
    • Empathy
    • Kindness
    • Gentleness
    • Understanding
    • Acceptance
    What I find fascinating is, it’s the very condition of being human, that would have prevented me from seeking more of these things as a younger man.
    In fact, I wouldn’t have had a reason, to seek these things. The methods taught me to survive and cope with the madness were working. For so long, wrapped up in the western world’s belief in what from happiness should take, and how to find it.
    Perhaps, now that you’re reading this, you are ready to cultivate the things that really matter in life. If not, there’s every chance it will be a while, before you come back here. Don’t leave it too long.
    As a consequence of understanding how my condition would have prevented me seeking more of the contents of my list, I know that the most powerful way of helping others, to live with less pain and suffering, is to simply be the very example of what I now seek as an older man.
    If you’re ready to find more of these things, and would like to become a shinning example to others, this podcast is a good place to start. Be clear: there is no suggestion that we should all become Buddhist monks. No. The suggestion is that we begin to listen, and become further examples, of those who believe, not just in the power of love and compassion, but in all the things on my list.
    Begin to cultivate the things that really matter

  • Centered

    Some time ago if I’d heard someone describe themselves as ‘centered’ I wouldn’t have considered them as a serious contender, however, I now know, this was because I had a very poor understanding of what it meant to feel this way

    It was only last night that I found myself wondering how to describe a certain state of mind. If anything, the way I felt, was a sort of non-feeling. And so today’s post is in response to last night’s state of mind.

    Being centered is to be exactly as the word would imply: in the centre. And last night I neither felt happy or sad, satisfied or dissatisfied, comfortable or uncomfortable, I was simply somewhere in between. I had no opinions on anything one way or another. I was centered.

    We must understand how this is a useful place to become familiar with, so that we may return to it, during stressful times

    We are emotional beings and these emotions are a very necessary part of us. The trick, of course, is to be in control of these emotions through being mindfully aware of the thoughts that drive them. When this is the case, we can hone and direct our passions, in a way that is controlled and at its most efficient. It’s when we act impulsively, without direction and planning, that things can go wrong. Being centered helps us to act in a calm and rational way. So if you want to be a serious contender, mindfulness, is key.