Practising Mindfulness

Category: Meditation & Mindfulness

  • Mindfulness of Anger

    ‘That is the practice of mindfulness called mindfulness of anger. When you notice that anger is coming up in you, you have to practice mindful breathing in order to generate the energy of mindfulness, in order to recognize your anger and embrace it tenderly. So then you can bring relief into you and not to act and to say things that can destroy, that can be destructive. And doing so, you can look deeply into the nature of your anger and know where it has come from’

    Thich Nhat Hanh in conversation with Krista Tippett

  • Discover a Different Form of Happiness

    It is slightly mind blowing to think that there is in fact a different form of happiness that we can cultivate and focus on

    We must firstly consider what it takes to touch on this other form of happiness. We do of course know the happiness we get from being amongst other people or from our consumerism. We can see the from of happiness we get from outside of ourselves. We feel it internally but the trigger is an external stimuli. Imagine the excitement of a night out with friends or a trip abroad. Image the feelings we receive when we buy something new. This is often what we’re taught happiness is about. I can even remember my own mother describing a child, who had everything they wanted in the material world, as someone who was very loved. Perhaps a way to rationalise her own inability to express love for her children in a tactile way.

    When we begin to see, that happy children aren’t necessarily from wealthy backgrounds, we begin to understand how innocence plays its part. Provided poverty doesn’t equal neglect, money, is actually irrelevant to a child

    One of the most important ways to discover, the form of happiness that exist within us, is the ability to be absolutely, fully, present. I’ve recently found myself with a responsibility I didn’t particularly want. However, understanding the importance of being present, has helped me, not only carry the burden easily, but to enjoy it.

    My sharing of a responsibility is easing the burden on someone else and that is giving me an enormous amount of satisfaction and pleasure. Being present during the process is enabling me to immerse myself fully into it. Whilst aware and present my mind is no longer seeking to be somewhere else doing something that carries less responsibility, or involves anther form of stimulation, that might be more fun. Mindfully working through my responsibility has taken any form of suffering away. When we want (to be doing something different somewhere else) we suffer. We could say that when suffering is removed happiness is what remains.

    This happiness is brought about as a result of fully immersing oneself in being alive. When we do this, pleasure can be derived from the most mundane of actions, because our happiness has changed form

    That’s right! The form of happiness has switch from an external stimulation to the simple pleasure derived from being present and alive. When we fully appreciate the pleasure of being alive – experienced when fully and absolutely present – we are happy. If we’re not fully present we’re not fully appreciating what it actually means to be alive. Our mind is somewhere other than here and now. Surly, when this is the case, are we not three quarters of the way to being dead? Be present and happy, through the mindfulness gained from learning how to improve your mental fitness, through proper meditation practice. Return to innocence now.

  • All the things to Cultivate

    There are certain conditions that will make it hard to cultivate the following:
    • Love
    • Compassion
    • Generosity
    • Empathy
    • Kindness
    • Gentleness
    • Understanding
    • Acceptance
    What I find fascinating is, it’s the very condition of being human, that would have prevented me from seeking more of these things as a younger man.
    In fact, I wouldn’t have had a reason, to seek these things. The methods taught me to survive and cope with the madness were working. For so long, wrapped up in the western world’s belief in what from happiness should take, and how to find it.
    Perhaps, now that you’re reading this, you are ready to cultivate the things that really matter in life. If not, there’s every chance it will be a while, before you come back here. Don’t leave it too long.
    As a consequence of understanding how my condition would have prevented me seeking more of the contents of my list, I know that the most powerful way of helping others, to live with less pain and suffering, is to simply be the very example of what I now seek as an older man.
    If you’re ready to find more of these things, and would like to become a shinning example to others, this podcast is a good place to start. Be clear: there is no suggestion that we should all become Buddhist monks. No. The suggestion is that we begin to listen, and become further examples, of those who believe, not just in the power of love and compassion, but in all the things on my list.
    Begin to cultivate the things that really matter

  • Reduce the Suffering of Others

    I no longer have anything to prove or reason to compete. I’d also like to cease any need to feel validated or approved of. Achieving these things requires mindfulness and once achieved bring peace of mind

    I’ve wondered what’s left when we take away competitiveness, approval and validation. I realise that in order to move forward and engage with life, as the teachers we all are, what remains, indeed must remain, is the simple desire to reduce the suffering of others. Why should we desire this? Because it reduces our own suffering.

    We can all help reduce the suffering we and others experience, through being mindful of our thoughts, speech and actions. These things are interconnected

    I feel we must have the ability to question our beliefs, so we may alter our views, as this enables us to ‘clean up’ our thinking; thinking that is the result of how we were conditioned. Once we’re able to clear the view we’re then able to ensure our thoughts are of a wholesome nature. When our thoughts are wholesome this is reflected in the things we say and do. As a consequence of improving these things, through mindfulness, we instantly reduce all suffering.

    It’s interesting to consider how life would be if more of us gained the awareness of unhealthy competitiveness and how we remain childlike in our need for validation and approval. By casting these things aside, we clear a path for different motivations, of a more wholesome nature. We experience more love and become more compassionate toward our fellow man, our home, our true home (our selves) and all living beings.

    Mindfulness is key. Consider today, how raising your awareness, can improve your quality of life.

  • More Love – A Healthy Requirement

    The ego wants to win because it’s being at the top that’s important. Wise men have told us to control our ego

    Control, through an awareness of the influence of ego, is essential if we’re to gain a true and lasting sense of happiness. The ego isn’t concerned with happiness but only with winning. And as we are often shown even the winners aren’t necessarily happy. The egotistical are often the most troubled of us all. And we mustn’t mistake the desires of the ego with the requirement for more love.

    When we have a clear understanding of what love achieves for us, and what the ego is seeking to achieve, we find our true sense of happiness

    I’ve often found myself confused as to what I’m looking for. I wonder: is this love or my ego? I’m cautious because I’m very aware of the dangers and limitations of my ego driven desires. A competitive nature is all well and good, yet the way to avoid the games and hurt our competitive nature can evoke is, to be able to separate love and ego.

    Love is the listener, love is the kind carer. Ego is the warlord and ego is the player

    So we must focus our attention on the healthy requirement of more love. What must we do to gain this? We must teach it. We must share it. And we must give freely of it. Love gives freely of itself, this is why it endures.

  • Centered

    Some time ago if I’d heard someone describe themselves as ‘centered’ I wouldn’t have considered them as a serious contender, however, I now know, this was because I had a very poor understanding of what it meant to feel this way

    It was only last night that I found myself wondering how to describe a certain state of mind. If anything, the way I felt, was a sort of non-feeling. And so today’s post is in response to last night’s state of mind.

    Being centered is to be exactly as the word would imply: in the centre. And last night I neither felt happy or sad, satisfied or dissatisfied, comfortable or uncomfortable, I was simply somewhere in between. I had no opinions on anything one way or another. I was centered.

    We must understand how this is a useful place to become familiar with, so that we may return to it, during stressful times

    We are emotional beings and these emotions are a very necessary part of us. The trick, of course, is to be in control of these emotions through being mindfully aware of the thoughts that drive them. When this is the case, we can hone and direct our passions, in a way that is controlled and at its most efficient. It’s when we act impulsively, without direction and planning, that things can go wrong. Being centered helps us to act in a calm and rational way. So if you want to be a serious contender, mindfulness, is key.

  • Empower Your Higher Self

    By taking control of your chattering mind you’re automatically giving your higher self a chance to be heard

    I firmly believe in the concept of a higher self. Without this belief to call on I feel my life would be at risk of spiralling out of control. And the important point to gain from todays post, is not so much the idea of a higher self, but the necessity of allowing this aspect of ourselves to be heard.

    If we never take the opportunity to stop and take control of our minds, through meditation that leads to improved mindfulness, what chance would a quiet, peaceful, and loving voice have of being heard? This voice is of course our own and can only be heard once all other chatter is still.

    Our internal chatter is the self-programming that instructs us on how to think and behave. And this in turn is based on our beliefs, hang ups, fears and ambitions. There’s a lot of clutter there and some of this clutter is the deciding factor in so many of our difficulties and anguish. So when we’re able to silence all the noise – if only for brief moments – our higher self is given the opportunity to break through.

    Your higher self knows the answers to so many of your questions. It is the part of you that knows what you must do in order to live well

    Through choosing to take control of your mind, you will be empowering your higher self, to award you clear instructions on what you must do. Consider how the only motivation of this aspect of your self is love. When we give love a voice, what do we hear?

  • My Life Saving Medicine

    Of late I’ve come to recognise how very important my medication is and the importance of taking it daily

    If I want to calmly enjoy each day, and be in command of my words and behaviour, I must remember to take my medication each day. My medicine helps me to remain aware of my nature and how fear and anxiety influences my behaviour. In addition to this, it helps me remain calmly aware of the nature of others and the dangers of allowing adult-children (self-centred people) to manipulate me with their cute and naughty ways. I’ve always been a sucker for allowing children to get the better of me with their naughty, manipulative, tricks.

    It’s important for us adults to be aware of the self-centred nature of adult-children. After all, we’re not doing the child any favours, if we’re failing to set firm boundaries

    And so, time and time again, we must remind ourselves to take our medication, as it’s the minds tendency to draw us back into old patterns of distraction and forgetfulness, as this is where it feels most comfortable. My habit has been to sleepwalk through life. Sleepwalking in respect of my lack of awareness of the self-centred. The self-centred have no concern for your wellbeing whatsoever. Their only concern is for themselves. It could be argued that this is the truth of human nature, however, I would suggest, that once we are grown we have a greater capacity to genuinely concern ourselves with the needs of others. My medicine helps me with this. Sometimes the search for the adults is lengthy.

    You might now ask: What is this wonderful, life saving, medicine?

    Well of course I’m talking about meditation leading to improved mindfulness. In terms of all the above and more, there’s no doubt in my mind, that this is the tool that’s making the difference. I can no longer sleepwalk through life with a lack of awareness. It was this lack that always left me feeling confused, unstable, and downtrodden. My daily dose of meditation continues to help me separate those that have any level of consideration for my needs and wellbeing (adults) from the gameplaying manipulative children (adult-children). You can raise your awareness too. It’s the simplest solution there is and I find the real adults have a far better grip on reality. A better grip on what really matters. And those that only have self-centred concerns tend to be the most destructive.

  • Emancipation from Identity

    As I meditated this morning my mind began to question the purpose of identity

    We all need to belong do we not? It’s important for us humans to be part of something, to feel included, valued and loved. Freud noted that one of our most powerful drivings is the need for greatness, perhaps, when we have a strong identity, it’s easier to find this. It’s my suggestion that we question what we identify with and question the value of this identity.

    I feel the longer we hold on to an identity, that automatically associates us with a negative and painful past, the longer we stay trapped

    Many would argue that it’s important to hold on to our identity. It is. after all, who we are. If we think of ‘our people’ as a group or race that have overcome adversity in the past, we must hold on to everything associated with this, and in turn be one of the great. All well and good, and yet hanging on to the hurt and anger from past oppression, and continually teaching guilt to the innocent, turns us into oppressors.

    Why would we need to continue to teach people, who have no connection to the past other than say a language or skin colour, to feel guilty about the wrongs of their ancestors? So we feel a sense of power? Guilt is most certainly used as a means of control over human behaviour, but ultimately backfires when seen for what it is. In fact those who are taught they are guilty will behave in a way dictated by this. An abused child, who has buried feelings of guilt, may well go on to become an abuser as an adult. In this respect what way might we be keeping racism alive?

    Identifying as a good, loving and compassionate human being, must surely be the only identity you’ll ever need

    And so during your meditation ponder on identity. Does what you identify with set you free? If not, simply consider yourself as a fellow human being, who is seeking to be the best version of themselves as possible. Consider love as the only companion you need. Consider the greatness you will find.

  • Golden Earrings

    Just recently I ordered a new watch from a very well know jewellers online shop. On arrival of the package I was immediately suspicious due to its size. The package was much smaller than you’d expect a watch to be. Even so, I opened it and, rather than the expected watch, I found a pair of earings, exactly like the ones in the image above.

    Me being me I was initially a little irritated and then thought of how stoicism and mindfulness would help me. So instead of being annoyed and disappointed I though of: ‘what stands in the way becomes the way’

    What could I learn from my initial feelings? I now understand that my feelings where driven by two things: a lack of control over the situation and my poor judgement of the service I’d been provided. Stepping back from feelings we can asses the situation differently. Mistakes are made by busy people who’re less informed about the importance of mindfulness. Recognising this calmed me and sending the earrings back became an easy process once I’d regained my calm and rational self.

    Giving every event significance, that we’re able to turn to a positive, has great power

    Through asking myself what I could understand about my feelings, should something similar happen again, I’m now empowered to deal with it in a way that is far more respectful to the balance of my mind. And there is the key: I’m empowered to be far more respectful to the balance of my mind.

    Let’s think about giving the event a positive significance. As someone who lives with slight hearing loss and tinnitus, I now also understand, that the ringing in my ears is diminished, when I seek to balance my mind through never looking to control anything that is outside my influence. Be this people or events, when I truly understand, that the only thing I’m able to control is my mind – its drivings (guilt, fear, love), how I think and how I respond to those thoughts – those ear-rings become a beautiful and powerful message.

    Take control of your life through understanding the power of Mindfulness