Practising Mindfulness

Category: Mindfulness Training

  • Equanimity and Serenity

    Image by Jason from Pixabay

    Looking closer at equanimity we can see how this state brings the power of serenity into our lives

    There is much more to this than simple semantics. On the surface, we might think both words mean the same thing. They connect. However, they do mean slightly different things. Using words in the way I’m about to help us to pin things down to specifics. Being specific about what we’re actually seeking and the order we must follow is important. With this in mind, I feel we must have achieved equanimity before we find serenity.

    Equanimity is achieved through searching and resolving that witch unsettles us

    For many years, I’ve struggled to find what was causing my mind to change so drastically. Although never diagnosed as such, I feel there has been a tendency toward ADHD and manic depressive behaviour.

    Those of us who have experienced a troubled childhood can find it challenging to control emotions. From a personal point of view, I feel a lack of self-awareness has been a deciding factor.

    Becoming more self-conscious (in the positive sense) through mindfulness has been the tipping point for me. And so my equanimity is achieved through the constant monitoring of my internal state through the practise of contemplative meditation and mindfulness.

    Mindfulness awards me greater control over my thoughts and reactions to the outside world, people, and circumstances. Also, I have greater control over cravings and habits. In fact, cravings and habits are becoming a non-issue as a result of my meditation, mindfulness, and equanimity.

    Serenity is the consequence of equanimity

    Often, the constant stimulation we seek has developed as a coping mechanism. So many of us simply detest having nothing to do. We might feel like we’re going out of our minds when we have nothing to stimulate us.

    Meditation might be extremely challenging. Quieting the mind seemingly impossible. I think in this instance, it would be beneficial to seek assistance and work through what the mind is avoiding. Certainly advisable before or after attendance on a Meditation to Mindfulness Training Workshop.

    Once the unconscious drivings behind our disquiet are revealed, our meditation practice will begin to bear fruit. Serenity is a consequence of a mind in equanimity, no longer restlessly avoiding the self. A mind that has come home.

  • Slow Up or You’ll Miss the Show (Show Up for Life!)

    I noticed how the pace of my walking sped up when my mind strayed into thinking about my destination

    It follows through everything; if your mind isn’t in the moment – thinking about what’s next and where you’re planning to be – you will miss more than you realise.

    During my walk this morning it was only during the moments when I was present that I noticed all the colours in the trees

    I noticed how calm the river was. I noticed the colour of the water and how brown it was due to the storm in the night. I noticed the nature of the morning light and how many leaves had now fallen to the ground. In particular I noticed flocks of birds as they woke from their morning roosts.

    It was when I remembered, to bring my awareness back to my steps and my breath, that I noticed how my walking had quickened during the time my mind had strayed into thinking about what lay ahead

    My aimlessness had ceased and my mind had filled with intention. During this time, I wasn’t walking, I wasn’t breathing, I’d become blind! In other words, because my awareness wasn’t in the present, I’d begun to miss the show.

    Such a beautiful display that mother nature had put on just for me. How could I be so disrespectful to her by not paying attention?

    Is it the case, that when I’m thinking about the destination, I’m speeding through the rest of my life? Have I wasted most of my life in this way? It upsets me to think that I probably have. Let’s keep remembering and show up for the show.

  • Quietly Observing War of the Forgetful

    It’s interesting how when I have cool-control over my mind, calmly observing the behaviour of the people around me, without judgement and emotion, I’m able to distance myself from its harm

    My mind is calm and quiet. I see the disrespectful son, insulting his father with no clear idea of how protected and shielded he is from the world through nepotism. If his father were to retire unexpectedly or become incapacitated in some way, the son would have a very rude awakening. He’s unaware of the true nature needed, and of what qualities it takes, to run a successful company.

    You see, I work for a company where the son, works for the father. A common thing and sometimes the dynamic can be difficult. If we were able to take each of them to one side it would be fairly easy to teach them how to better get along, before some calamity strikes. I feel it’s inevitable that things will reach a climax, and when they do, I’ll potentially be out of a job. At least for a while. So be it. Que sera, sera . . .

    Both father and son are players. In a way it doesn’t really matter. It’s only a small war of words and emotions. Something humans seem to thrive on, unless you’re a practitioner of meditation, and mindfulness that is. Then you thrive on something very different

    As someone engaged with the study of mind you’re able to defend yourself against any unnecessary, painful, war of words and emotions

    I’m aware of how father, son and colleagues, are attempting to play me. I often imagine myself as a spiting cobra, raised up, silently assessing the threat, ready to strike. I could, if I chose, spit the venom of well chosen words. Instead, knowing I have a dangerous bite, I silently observe the game-play and remind myself of how this war is the war of the forgetful. I choose not to engage with it, the war rages on without me. A practitioner of mindfulness has no need for such things. The practitioner of mindfulness has love on their side.

  • Know Meditation Know Mindfulness

    This week, I slipped. That’s right, I slipped into an old pattern of feeling negative, stressed, and eating junk. And the only reason for it was forgetting the importance of Meditation

    Monday and Tuesday felt like great days. I felt calm and contented. I ate exactly the amount of food that was right for my body and activity. The energy in energy out balance was in tune. I felt great. The rest of the week gradually went to shit and the reason? I forgot to Meditate on each of the subsequent mornings.

    My usual routine is to do some stretches (yes, I’ve succumbed and learnt some yoga), and then I sit for around twenty minutes to meditate and calm my mind. When I do this, the day is always improved, my mood is better, and of course, it’s conducted Mindfully.

    When my day is conducted mindfully – that is to say I’m predominantly in the present moment and aware – it always runs smoother. The quality of my work is on form, and the customers I meet feel better for the experience

    I’ve come to realise that as I reflect on the week, it was the days I didn’t meditate that were markedly different. I felt harassed by my boss and my customers’ demands. Their demands hadn’t changed it was my mood and attitude that had. In an attempt to change my mood, I craved and ate sugar. And after eating pastry and chocolate, I actually ended up feeling worse! Guilt stepped in!

    Each day, my stress and problems grew worse. It was as if my forgetfulness (opposite of Mindfulness) was some kind of sick experiment on myself to see how shit I could make my week. To make matters worse, I didn’t go for my daily walk. What the hell!?

    The positive from this is how I’m reminded of the importance of sticking to my routine. For me, routine is very important

    Every negative has its opposite. I’m now renewed in my endeavour to be an enthusiastic exponent of Meditation that leads to Improved Mindfulness. I’m reminded of how important it is to Meditate every day. If we want to strengthen our minds and improve the quality of our lives, we must practise. We must practise Mindfulness to stay on the path. It is easy to forget its power.

    Remember, the mind is predisposed to lead you along the path of least resistance. Old established patterns that conserve energy are easily fallen into.

    The mind easily falls into old patterns of thinking and behaviour. And like cart wheels that are stuck in a rut, we must, from time to time, use that little extra effort to pull the mind free.

    We have to focus and concentrate. This strengthens the mind. And just as a weightlifter might occasionally feel tired and disinclined to work out, he must persist. The results speak for themselves.

  • Mindful of Mind

    Be mindful of your mind and become aware of how you create the reality you’re living

    Your reality is determined by your thoughts and drivings. The filters to life are your beliefs. If, for example, I choose to put a backpack on and simply walk the earth, how would my life be? Life would initially become very frightening and insecure for me. I would experience hardship and hunger. We all have the capacity to survive extreme hardship. As such, in time, my life would open up into something extraordinary.

    No telly, no media, no influence other than the world of nature I see around me. Without the influences of society how would things change? Without a ‘normal’ life, doing everything I believed I needed to do in order to fit in, there would be a massive shift. If I stuck with it for long enough my fear would fade. I would be as free as a tramp. My beliefs, no longer fed by ‘normality’, would change. I would need to be cautious. I might be in danger; shunned and perhaps even hated by the rest of society. My freedom would terrify them.

    Most of these changes would happen as a result of the quiet

    Mindfully going about the business of walking the earth my mind would become calm. My internal dialog would change. The old dialog, previously there simply as a means of confirming my old identity, would be fading. Thoughts about where my next meal was coming from and where I would sleep later in the evening would be my overriding concerns. My mind would certainly not be filled with opinions and judgements about the activities of other people. I would need to draw no comparisons. My thinking would change.

    Being aware of my thoughts would help me ‘catch’ the old habit of comparing myself to others. I might walk past a large beautiful house and momentarily I might start making a comparison. They have everything and I have nothing. This comparison is easily quashed when I become aware: It is me that has freed myself. The house, the status; all there as a prize for the owners success in life. What success? Is success the ‘trappings’ of life? Or is success the discovery of ones self? Ones mind?

    Is success measured by our ability to conform to the ‘norms’ set out by society. It certainly seems this way. What happens when we measure success as non-success? As non-attainment? What happens when we see how success is something built on our need for power over others? I can finally see the power in humility. It is in fact the humble who have true power. The humble-aware are allowing the rest of us to continue making fools of ourselves in our pursuit of power.

    For a time we may lose our minds in our need for the illusion of power. We find our true power when we find our self

    Returning home to ones self is achieved through becoming aware. Our true power is realised when we have awareness. Awareness of the consequences of our thoughts. Awareness of cause and effect. Control over the nature of our thoughts. The strength of mind to bring ourselves home.

  • Mindful Protection

    Gently bring the mind back into the present moment through focusing on the breath

    On the occasions, when we choose to open our minds to what the media is showing us, it seems like the world has gone mad. Has it ever been any different? Large scale conflicts are only symbolic of the turmoil and conflict our leaders are facing. Warped ideology (from our perspective) anger, fear, the need for control, the ego, et cetera, et cetera. All symptomatic of minds out of control.

    Take control of your mind. Take control of your life

    Self consciousness, self awareness, call it what you will. The greater our awareness of thoughts, and how they dictate the kind of life we live, the better. There are those who thrive on chaos. In fact they long for it because it’s all they know. I can relate to this. For much of my time I rejected all that was good in my life through my minds need to feed its addiction to chaos. Constant stimulation. Constant craving. The constant need to ease my loneliness. A loneliness fed by my need for chaos. Can you see the destructive cycle I was in? This is what so many of us are doing: Seeking to ease our loneliness. In the process, our minds take us unceasingly toward what we refuse to look at: Our fear and loneliness. It is us that’s creating the destructive cycle. It is our minds attempt to understand. Great leaders and philosophers of the past knew this and looked to help humanity in its struggles. Until we break the cycle, how will we ever understand? We cannot read and implement what the great leaders of the past taught us without first becoming aware.

    The solution, countless enlightened individuals have found is, mindfulness

    With practice we can get to the root of what we are. We can find a calmness of mind, underneath the chaos, that reveals pure awareness. When we have this, we’re able to notice all the beauty that surrounds us.

    Personal circumstances matter not. There is suffering, yet our suffering can be eased, when we have clear insight into how it is us that amplifies our self-destructive tendency.

    We could choose anger

    Mindfulness helps us understand, it’s what we choose, that determines the quality of life we experience. No matter your circumstances, through learning how to take control of your mind, you empower yourself to make the right choices. If you want purpose in your life make it the development of mindfulness. Develop a beautiful mind. People with purpose make their own choices. Not those dictated to them by others.

  • Sowing the Seeds

    If you have a plan place Understanding Meditation and Mindfulness at its Heart

    Love is Every Step – Thich Nhat Hanh

    It’s certainly how I intend spending my retirement. Someone recently asked me if I was concerned about the future. Being concerned about the future would be to use the wrong terminology. I would suggest, rather than use the word concern, use the word intension. It has positivity.

    I’m using a degree of tension to stay on track. Think of the tension we must apply to a bowstring before firing the arrow. We must have intension as much as we must have purpose. Those with purpose to life tend to have far fewer addictions (stronger willpower) and healthier minds in general.

    In order, to gently and successfully progress with our planned purpose, awareness is key. Mindful of every step.

    Keep an eye on the future

  • Finding Refuge Through Meditation and Mindfulness

    Whenever I find myself feeling anxious or overly emotional, I remind myself, of what my skills of meditation and mindfulness offer me. The knowledge that I have these tools, easily at my disposal, instantly reassures me

    It doesn’t matter what our age or circumstances there are going to be times when we feel troubled. It’s life. Life is meant to challenge us from time to time. It’s part of the process. It’s not possible for us to grow and experience the full kaleidoscope, of what life has to offer us, if we’re not occasionally challenged.

    Meditation leads to an improved level of stillness and calm that comes from everyday mindfulness

    It’s common nowadays for people to comment on how calm they find me. They describe me as a ‘calming influence’ and this is something I’m proud of. I’m proud because this has not always been the case. Quite the opposite in fact.

    I have, in the past, allowed my emotions to control my actions. This can of course be disastrous. And so, as a result of improving my mental fitness – through daily meditation – I’m capable of being increasingly mindful. I’m mindful of how my judgments, opinions, beliefs, thoughts and emotions, influence my behavior and, above all, my choices. When I’m troubled, I take refuge in my practice. I dedicate time to calm myself before making decisions or taking action.

  • Philtrum – Love Charm

    With his little finger he gently stroked the little piece of skin just beneath her nose. He didn’t understand why he was drawn to doing this. She said, “are you messing with my symmetry?” He didn’t know how to respond to that. Some time later, after their love affair had ended, she moved away to a Greek island, got married, and had a family

    Sit, cross legged, back straight, imagining a small piece of string gently pulling upwards from the grown of your head. There is a little strength in your abdomen, your lips are parted and your tongue is resting gently behind your two front teeth. Breathing through your nose now, noticing the temperature of the in breath, compared to that of the out breath. Your hands are resting inside each other in your lap, palms upturned, forming the shape of an empty bowl. Your aim today is to spend a short while focusing all of your attention on the area just beneath your nose. This is called the Philtrum.

    In Jewish tradition, each embryo has an angel teaching it all of the wisdom in the world while it is in utero. The angel lightly taps the infant’s upper lip before birth to prevent the infant from revealing the secrets of the universe; the infant then forgets the Torah it has been taught

    This focus on the Philtrum helps us to strengthen our concentration. When your mind wanders, and you become aware of this, gently bring your attention back to the Philtrum and continue . . .

  • Latest News from The Layman’s Philosopher

    No News is Good News

    Reporting on this blog some time ago I spoke of the need to stop looking at the news. Finally this is something I have followed through with and the results are very interesting. As the saying goes, old habits are hard to break, and how true this is. And it is raising our awareness to our daily actions that is key to dropping those habits that – if they were ever useful in the first place – no longer serve a purpose.

    The news is full of extremes and if we were to believe that these extremes are somehow normal, and the general behaviour of human kind, then we begin to see the world as a pretty rotten place. This was happening to me and has for many years, I completely lost my faith in human kind, as all the horrors of the news became some dreadful generalisation in my mind.

    My habit was to wake up at around 6am, eat breakfast, drink coffee and read the news. I would then begin to feel very tired and would then doze for about another hour or so before finally getting up

    For some strange reason I didn’t put it together that it was reading the news that was having the tiring effect on me. Reading about the extremes of human nature is so exhausting to me, that I would need to doze off and block it all out again, in an attempt to wake up afresh. Only afresh wasn’t happening, there would remain a sort of gloomy fog, hanging over me for most of the morning.

    Now I wake at 6am, eat breakfast, drink coffee and then go out for a walk along the beautiful river Dart. In the morning I now have time to do things like gentle weight training and writing a blog.

    IN other news: The self-centred have no concern for your emotional needs, at all.

    Imagine a demanding child. Quite easy to do really isn’t it. Now imagine this child holding concern for an adults emotional needs. The child will know if a parent or carer is sad or in distress, and will seek to ease this in any way they know how. They will do this simply because an unhappy parent or carer is a threat to their survival. And it certainly can’t be possible for a child to provide emotional sustenance to an adult, only another adult, can do that.

    So if an adult is emotionally limited (unable to recognise, appreciate, understand and express all their emotions) they will be unable to show appropriate consideration for the emotional needs of another. They’re potentially emotionally stuck in childhood and therefore very self-centred. If we’re in this kind of relationship, where one of us is equipped to consider the needs of others, and the other not, then of course this kind of discord eventually eats away at the health of the partnership.

    It can be that we’ve been taught to always consider the needs of others and sometimes this is to the extreme of putting others emotional needs before our own

    An imbalance of this kind in a close relationship between two adults spells disaster. It is important to look deeply at how limited we may be in expressing and understanding our emotions. If we want to move out of childhood into healthy adult relationships, where the needs of others are also important, we must become aware. Relationships where our needs are placed as equally important can be beautiful and rewarding. Being mindful of others involves an awareness of the differences between self-centred, selfish, and self-aware.

    Learn meditation to mindfulness