Practising Mindfulness

Category: World Affairs

  • The Joy of Attention

    Image by No-longer-here

    Most of us have seen or heard the parable about the Two Wolves (if not here it is). It’s a very simple way of demonstrating how we create or ease conflict. In the same vein, I feel it’s useful to consider anything we choose to give our attention to, as being the thing that becomes the most prominent.

    Is it obvious that we are our thoughts?

    We might think it obvious that if we’re preoccupied with thoughts of anger, revenge, guilt, or any negative, that it eventually reflects in the body and how we behave. And yet is it that obvious? Surely if people really were aware of how the bodymind is affected by thoughts and behaviour, they’d modify this, by taking better care of their minds.

    It does, once again, come down to awareness

    We can only imagine how the world would be if our leaders paid more attention to their own thoughts and behaviour. My own recent thoughts relating to death and loss have brought this issue home to me. I’ve recently been telling myself that with each peaceful person we lose, the world feels like a darker place. And indeed it will be if we give these kind of thoughts attention.

    The antidote is the awareness of our thoughts

    Everyday the world experiences gains and losses. Everyday something is destroyed and something is created. There is a natural balance within the universe, it’s something I believe. And so we can choose to tip this balance – through dark depressive thoughts – or we can tip it the other way, it is entirely up to us.

    The joy of attention is all about realising how our lives are dictated by our thoughts

    Those who lust for power and influence through nefarious means will always end their days in a sticky mess. It’s the old proverb: Live by the sword die by the sword. Much better to pay attention to the beauty, love, peace and kindness there is in the world. And no matter how prevalent those who lust for what they can’t have might seem, simply place your attention on what you already have, for however long, that might be.

  • When We Finally Meet Our Alien-Selves

    How are we to recognise what we’ve never experienced? How are we to love the stranger we do not know

    Are we all searching or waiting for something? Some inspiration, reward, or experience? During this search, is it possible to experience a feeling or state of mind that is so unfamiliar to us that we pass it off as alien and so reject it?

    We might mistake calm, for example, as sleepiness and then drink copious amounts of coffee to wake us up. We might mistake contentedness as lacklustre and world weariness. We might mistake contentedness as having given up.

    Most of us are constantly seeking to change how we feel

    It’s fascinating when we think of it. What an earth is going on that we should feel the need to be in a different state to the one we naturally find ourselves? How is it we can’t simply be as we find? And it runs into so many aspects of our lives, doesn’t it?

    My mind instantly jumps into thinking about young girls and how they feel the need to change or enhance their physical appearance. Obviously, on some level, they believe their natural-selves to be lacking, or they feel the need to compete and establish stronger identities than their peers; to be larger than life; to be more than what they appear to be. To deceive the observer.

    Just as an ignorant child wants to put his finger in the flame, our fascination with our emotional selves drives unnecessary provocation

    It’s certain that if more time were spent explaining emotions, their purpose, and how to manage them, they’d be less need to put fingers to flame. Just as the moth is drawn to the flame, we also lose our way through ignorance and confusion.

    When we experience the unfamiliar, we must pause and immerse ourselves instead of instantly rejecting it and seeking to change

    When the young girl, who lacks self-awareness, looks in the mirror, she imagines herself with bigger lips and different eyebrows.

    When those who’re unfamiliar with calm and contentment feel this alien emotion, they instantly imagine themselves stimulated doing or being somewhere else. Instead, when we finally meet our alien-selves, it’s useful to pause and give them a chance to explain. When we see them in the mirror, pause and see the beauty that’s already there.

  • Vaccines for the Body Awareness for the Mind

    Image by mollyroselee
    I wonder about the effectiveness of meditation as much as I wonder about the effectiveness of vaccines

    When I first sat down to write this piece I began to think about how effective meditation would have been for me some years ago. Whilst in the middle of being terrified and lost would meditation have been of any value to me? Would it have even been possible?

    In answer to those questions, I think without it being explained to me, in clear terms, what the effects and consequences of improved awareness are, my experience of meditation would have been very brief. However, if, by first understanding exactly why my life was such a disaster (to be made aware of all the consequences to loneliness and a better exploration of my delusional beliefs) meditation might have saved me a lot of time and suffering.

    When we’re grasping for the next thing – be this a drink or some other distraction – to gain control, we need to see the underlying cause

    It was last night that I found myself thinking about isolation. How, as a child, if my behavior was disruptive, I would be punished through being sent into isolation in my bedroom. I hated this, I remember feeling very troubled when excluded from the rest of the family. I would creep to the top of the stairs, which were open-plan, so I could see what was going on, only to be spotted by one of my sisters and then told to get back to my room.

    I know now, that the reason being in my bedroom alone was so difficult, was because it compounded my sense of loneliness. When in company my loneliness was far less apparent. The effect and consequences to this, in adulthood, was to spend time drunk (to feel comfortable around people) in pubs to make my loneliness less apparent. A further consequence was my need for constant stimulation and the avoidance of quiet time alone.

    What I’ve since needed, in order to stop grasping for something to ease the pain of loneliness, is an understanding of what lies at its root. If we neither know or like ourselves, loneliness is the result. We will always seek ways to ease this pain.

    With this knowledge, meditation, that leads to improved everyday mindfulness, helps me defend my mind against the many predators and players in life, and also remain vigilant to the importance of self-awareness

    The long and the short of it is, improved awareness, has great value provided we understand the root to our dysfunctionality. If you are currently experiencing a high degree of instability, working through this, with a mental health professional, is recommended. And a must before Meditation to Mindfulness Workshop attendance.

    Philip Whittingham is currently only able to offer Analytical Hypnotherapy Services through home visits in the South West of England.

  • A Celebration of Consciousness

    Image by Artturi Mäntysaari 
    A dumbing down of consciousness is to be locked into routine and the habit of fantasising about the future. A celebration of consciousness is to be learning, growing, changing and developing

    It’s estimated that consciousness developed about 5 million years ago. Imagine how it must of been for the babies of great apes, with a more fully developed cortex, to begin experiencing self-awareness. And consider how, some 5 million years later, we’ve come to utilise and better understand our consciousness.

    If we’re to continue celebrating consciousness, we must recognise the importance of growth, change and development

    If we search for it every positive has its opposite. And of course consciousness brings along with it the downsides of sentience. Along with the the joys of life we’re also aware of the sufferings. Physical and emotional pain is something we seek to avoid, and many of the ways we do this, has the unfortunate side effect of blunting our consciousness.

    We must be guarded against the habit of avoidance because as we do this, the dumbing down of our consciousness, means we’re less aware of the opposites of what we’re choosing to avoid

    Keeping the mind present through the technique of mindfulness does mean we become increasingly aware of the sharper edges to life, however, these things become less sharp through our increased awareness of the wonders in life. It’s a nonsense to dumb down everything – either through drugs, fantasy or routine – in an attempt to avoid the inevitable pains of life. When fully experiencing the phenomenon of consciousness we fully experience all that life brings. Mindfully celebrate your consciousness. Learn to meditate.

    Workshop Schedule

  • Advanced Meditation (overcome vulnerability)

    We are all alone because it is impossible for any other person to be part of our mind, body or soul. No-one will ever share the same thoughts, feelings or belief systems in exactly the same way as another, this, is to be alone – Create Beautiful Partnerships

    If we’re uncomfortable when alone then there will be great benefit to meditating on the statement above. This kind of meditation is not for the faint hearted as it can be extremely painful to realise just how alone – in respect of the statement – we all are. The statement is a truism and no amount of argument can alter this. 

    If we’re in company, then we are not physically alone, and therefore, we may not feel lonely. However, many of us can relate to feeling lonely, even when in the company of others. This can be due to being amongst people we have no affinity with, but, there is a simple understanding that can help.

    Furthermore if we have no acceptance and no understanding of the differences between aloneness, oneness and loneliness we can be vulnerable. Vulnerable, lonely people, are often taken advantage of.

    In order to gain the courage to actually be alone, without feeling fearful, we must break through a pain barrier. This barrier is the pain of realisation. Once again the words of Kahlil Gabran come to mind: “Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding”

    When we truly accept and understand our aloneness we will see that loneliness is the product of being lonely from the self

    Something you may find a comfort, whilst meditating, is to foster the curiosity of how many other individuals there might currently be, seeking, the emptiness of meditation. Imagine these people sitting beside you. Experience an emptiness of mind and then ask yourself how many other meditators are currently experiencing similar sensations during these moments. The comfort we gain comes from the realisation of our oneness. We may be alone and yet at root we are all the same in our aloneness. Ponder and have courage.

    We must have a beautiful partnership with ourselves before we can ever dream of one with another. Learning how to enjoy solitude is essential in determining who we attract into our lives. The ability to spend time with only your thoughts for company, costs nothing, and the benefits are priceless – Create Beautiful Partnerships

  • The Calmest of Minds

    Nirvana can be understood

    I want you to imagine a state of mind that sits between thoughts. Imagine a moment where time has stopped. Imagine a moment where there is simply no desire to be doing anything other than what is currently happening. There is a sense of stillness.

    The silence is the result of there being no friction, no resistance. Total absorption in the present moment

    It involves an understanding of what you’ve been seeking all your life. You’ve been seeking this sense of calm but looking in the wrong direction. You’ve been seeking answers and solutions instead of acknowledging what your mind has been showing you for years. It is already what you are; where you are. Let go and allow your mind to show you now.

    Ask yourself what your mind has been showing you that is beyond craving, desire, needs, or wants

    Don’t be fooled into thinking this is complicated. In fact, it’s the simplicity that can catch us out. There are layers of deceit and lies that we must cut through to get to the truth. It’s all the clutter associated with the human condition. The lust for power. The need for control. It involves none of these things. What it does involve is the understanding that the human condition is exactly that: a condition. A state of conditioning.

    At the centre of our being, there is a place devoid of conditioning. Devoid of the human condition of seeking power and control. Let these things go, and nirvana will be within your reach.

  • The Power of Awareness

    Image by John Hain
    How remarkable it is that we’re able to think about our own thinking

    What an extraordinary talent we have in being able to objectively observe our own thoughts. That is of course providing we choose to. If we’re too integrated; intertwined with our thoughts, we might struggle to step away from them, long enough to see them as separate from ourselves. This is where meditation comes to the fore.

    With practice meditation enables us to slow down and become aware

    That’s right, as we seek to focus our attention on a physical function of the body (breathing for example) we can become aware of our thoughts. We expand on this by then beginning to question their nature. More than anything, we must ask ourselves if our thoughts have any positive, and productive value. Are our thoughts of a critical, judgmental nature, only there to compound the negatives we believe about ourselves, or are they constructive and valuable? The simple process of observing these thoughts, and asking if they’re of any real value to our lives, is an example of the power of awareness.

    As we become increasingly aware of our thoughts, building the ability to detach ourselves from them, we raise awareness and take control

    So often our defensive ego seeks to ward off attacks from those who might be less aware than ourselves. The negative, patronising comment or post-it note a colleague leaves for our attention, becomes a little mind-worm. We might believe ourselves to be quite important with a valuable contribution to make and all we get is attacked. If we are to remain healthy and well adjusted it is our ego we must bring under control.

    Our ego has no concern for our mental health it is simply the custodian of our beliefs and must defend them to the death

    One of the most powerful points you must take from this post today is, how the ego knows no difference between those beliefs that lift us, and help us move forward in life, and those that simply lock us into circular, negative thinking. All is not lost though, you’ve been made aware of how meditation enables you to step away from your thoughts – raising your awareness to them – so you may cease their destructive influence. In this way, you are actively selecting those ego-driven thoughts that are positive, and rejecting those that have no real value. You are actively choosing thoughts that improve and maintain a good quality of life. 

    Mindfulness is the product of meditation and it is our improved awareness that will keep tabs on destructive thinking from the ego 

    So when it comes down to it the power of awareness is the power to live well. The power to actively choose happiness over worry, stress and negativity, comes from improved awareness of thoughts and their nature. We can choose to either get upset and become defensive over the behaviour of others, or we can choose calm as we see the real driver of our emotions, as us. Remember, the ego is the custodian of beliefs and many of our thoughts are simply there as a means to compound and maintain them. This is the job of the ego no matter how beneficial or destructive these beliefs are. It is our job to raise our awareness so we may bring the ego under our control. When we practice this kind of mindfulness, every moment of our lives, amazing begins to happen. We begin to live well under the terms of the beliefs we choose to see value in. 

    Live well, learn to meditate. 

  • You Neither Succeed Nor Fail at Meditation

    Image by pasja1000 from Pixabay
    It’s no riddle only awareness

    Sometime we sit and it really is some time before we realise that our point of focus has vanished only to be replaced with thoughts. In the early stages of practicing meditation we might think of this as failure; that the mind isn’t strong enough to hold our point of focus. In one respect only is this correct.

    Holding a point of focus does take mental strength

    Even so, we mustn’t think that if we’re unable to hold our point of focus (let’s say the end of the nose) for very long, that this is failure. It simply is the fact that until we’ve built our mental strength we will only be able to hold attention – single pointedly – for brief spells. Over time this improves.

    Our meditation will change from one day to the next

    The whole point of meditation is to become aware of the changing nature of the mind. The more we have going on in our lives the more crowded our thoughts. This will be observed during meditation and as we practice every day we will become aware of how the level of focus required (to bring the mind back on point) also changes according to the level of activity in our brains.

    It is counter productive to judge

    An overly active mind that proves difficult to bring on point is this way because of judgement. We mustn’t work hard at bringing the mind on point and then judge this as a failure if it refuses. In fact, the more we work at focusing, the harder it seems to get. It can seem that the mind has become more determined at wandering off. A little like a belligerent child or a wayward puppy that won’t come to heal. If we become emotional with the child or puppy training becomes an effort. It becomes hard. So we mustn’t make a judgement we must just observe and notice the wandering nature of the mind, once we do this, we’re able to bring it back. As with any training, repetition is key.

    Remember: our repetition isn’t the key to succeeding or accomplishing anything, it is simply an effortless means, of raising our awareness.

    Raising awareness heralds change

    So now that we’re aware of the nature of mind, how it craves for stimulation and activity, we’re better able to bring the mind to where we want it. And where we want it is the present moment. Fully engaged in the present moment we’re not worrying about the future or judgmentally replaying the past. Absolutely, mindfully in the present, we’re not wanting or seeking something different from now, we’re mindfully staying away from replaying past hurts or regrets. Free from thoughts and emotions of past or future we’re fully alive in the present moment now. Mindfulness heralds change through an awareness of the present.

    It’s when the mind is wandering that stagnation in the present occurs

    Of course we must first dream of a better future and then we must take action. If we stay in wonderland the future remains a fantasy. Down the rabbit hole is a useful place for the fearful or unwell who need to escape their reality. As for the rest of us, we must stay at the surface of our awareness, and mindfulness from meditation is the tool.

  • Beautifully Mindful

    Image by Dimitris Vetsikas from Pixabay
    The first thing to be aware of is that living a beautiful life takes effort and constant monitoring

    I currently live in a small but expanding town on the south coast of England called Dartmouth. It’s fairly well known for its connections to the British Navy and the fact it’s situated alongside the mouth of the river Dart. A great place, and due to this has many visitors, in particular, during the summer months. During this time it can feel a little claustrophobic.

    Many people keep their boats on the river and in addition to this there are a lot of wealthy second home owners who also visit in the summertime. An extreme example of this population explosion occurs in a town a little further along the coast called Salcombe. During the winter the population of this town is around two thousand and during the summer months this can increase to as much as twenty two thousand. Seasonal change is something the people of Devon have become accustomed to. As a means of escaping the summer occupation of Dartmouth, my partner and I keep a little caravan in a much quieter part of Devon, that isn’t quite so seasonally affected.

    Now as I’m sure you can imagine, many of the business’s in the south west of England are dependent on the tourist industry. For example, there’s a little business, recently established alongside the river Dart, that teaches people how to paddleboard. There is some unfortunate news in that they’ve recently had most of their boards and paddles stolen. Even so, I’ve no doubt they’re insured and will soon be back in business teaching people how to have fun on the river very soon. There is a point to all of this that I’ll come back to. In the meantime consider this statement:

    I care about me more than I care about anybody else

    No matter how idyllic or stress-free the setting, if the mind isn’t absolutely present, this environment will never be fully experienced or appreciated. In this regard, at some point during our lives, we will all face challenges and distractions from our plans. On some level we all plan to have a nice time and enjoy our lives as much as possible. Even so, it’s interesting how many of us aren’t able to appreciate, and sometimes even recognise, when we’ve reached one of the markers we’ve set ourselves. A prime example of this would be to overly involve ourselves with the troubles of others.

    Take the stolen paddleboards. On hearing the news we might become saddened or angered and we might (as was the case) exaggerate the facts. One local person took it on themselves to spread the gossip that the paddleboard thieves – rather than stealing everything – had vindictively broken the paddles. This wasn’t true and is example of someone becoming overly involved with the distress of others and then needing to spread this negativity. If we want a comfortable, stress-free existence, we must constantly monitor and be aware of our thoughts and behaviour. We must also monitor to what extent we allow the thoughts and behaviours of others to affect us.

    Another example concerns the inability to distance ourselves from the troubles of family members. We have ties to family that place demands on our time and energy. Once family members have reached adulthood it is expected that they’re then able to take full responsibility for themselves. There are times when this can’t be the case (perhaps due to unforeseen illness) and so family members must step in to help. Even so, through having awareness and control over our minds, we’re able to separate, compartmentalize and prioritise ourselves.

    You must always place yourself as the priority and be aware of how easily you can be distracted

    Remember: no matter how beautiful the setting and the life, if you’re not fully engaged with this – in the moment – it will all be for nothing. Take control of your mind, through learning how to successfully meditate, so that you may improve everyday mindfulness.

    When it comes to the troubles of other this is an occasion when it is of great value to cast the mind forward to a time when the troubles are over. No matter the problem it will always come to an end. Everything has an ending. In predicting the future we’re also able to see how things always average out and in the end.

    So we can see the value in keeping the mind present and we can also see how casting the mind forward also has value. My partner and I understand how claustrophobic Dartmouth can get in the summer and we compensate for this through planning our little escapes. Without occasionally thinking ahead this wouldn’t be possible. When we’re at our caravan our minds must be present and enjoying what we’ve created there. And the same applies when we’re in Dartmouth.

    Engaged in the present moment we feel everything that is occurring now. If in this moment things are not as we want them, there is a tendency to need escape. It’s a fabulous survival strategy. However, for us to live fully, we must be prepared to experience all of the aspects presented to us. If we lazily allow our minds to constantly wander off we will often delay making necessary changes.

    In contrast, if we have reached a point in our lives where it feels like plans are coming together, we can easily be distracted by the troubles of others. We can be driven by the negative forces of guilt. Once again if we’re allowing our minds to wander off we can forget that everyone has a responsibility to themselves. We all have the ability to plan and care for ourselves within these plans. If others have failed to do this, failed at getting their insurance in order, we must be aware that there is no value in sharing the discomfort they might experience as a result. There is no value in you experiencing it with them. Others must be left to wonder how you mange to remain present and happy.

  • This Extraordinary Moment

    Image by Reimund Bertrams from Pixabay
    Human history is full of extraordinary moments

    Even though this is true, when we bring things down to a personal level, it really is only this present moment now that matters. Of course the important proviso is, that you’re actually fully aware, and immersed in this moment now.

    For me, being fully in the moment, involves an awareness of just how weird and wonderful everything is. I imagine myself feeling similar to how a child must feel when viewing everything for the first time. There is an added appreciation of this due to my awareness of just how much I don’t know or can come close to understanding. This only makes the moment even more fascinating.

    All in all, human drama, pales into insignificance, when we glance at the bigger picture

    We mustn’t become self-absorbed as a result of being present. There is the tendency to be this way during meditation. In fact, on reading a lot of the literature surrounding the subject, we can be misled into thinking that meditation is all about the self. Initially, it might start off this way, and yet in time we must gain an awareness, through our meditation, of our place in the world. Through this, we can gain a sense of how small and insignificant we are, and there is value in this.

    The value, in seeing our insignificance, comes from understanding proportion

    If we become overly absorbed with our own lives and problems we can easily make the mistake of losing our sense of proportion. Fear of death or illness is a prime example. Stepping outside of ourselves, we see how the bigger picture can help us to appreciate, that there really is, only one moment we can live in. It’s a bit like the wealthy man with all his money, possessions, and places he can be. He can only ever be in one place at a time. The more we grasp, and want to claim for ourselves, outside of this one moment, the less we’re actually alive. The more we have the more distracted the mind is from appreciating our insignificance. Never see insignificant as a negative. When we are insignificant so are our problems.

    Take a moment to wonder at what exists outside and then marvel at the very fact you have an awareness of this

    It may seem a very strange thing to assert, that within the grand scheme of things, you are no more then a spec of dust. None of us. Not even the wealthy and powerful. I believe true power comes from an awareness of this. There is true power in knowing that you know nothing and there is true power in understanding your insignificance.

    I would much rather this than live the life of a dreamer seeking the illusion of recognition or significance. But then again, if none of us had dreamt of something different, would we have ever reduced the suffering we experienced in the past? An interesting question is it not? Perhaps, through understanding our individual insignificance, we could dream of a better future for all.